Monday, December 28, 2015

How to Get the Smell of Something Dead off of your Cow Dog



RECIPE to Get Dead Critter Smell off of your COW DOG:


Cooking/Cleaning Time -- 4 to 5 hours
Outside Temperature - Preferably not below 30 degrees Fahrenheit
Disposable Gloves
2 Twelve Cup Pots of Coffee
ICE
2X Dawn Dishwashing Liquid
Old Rag
Water Hose
Old Big Towel
After you are over your initial retching from the smell and swearing he's never setting foot back in your house again, and after a few hours and more have passed to let your beloved dog hopefully roll around on the grass or in the sand and lessen the horribleness of his odor . . . . glove up and get started.
Brew the first pot of Coffee, split it between another container and the pot, put in lots of ice to cool both containers down for about a half hour.
Take a really deep breath, step out the door, carefully grasp in one gloved hand your beloved dogs collar, and slowly slowly pour the coffee directly on the area of his back where it is slick and stinky with the dead stuff.
Gasp for breath and say 'Love You' and walk away rapidly back through the door.
Repeat above 3 times more at least at 30 to 45 minute intervals.
Now, the smell is practically gone, may really be gone, but no way you'd want to take that chance the coffee might wear off or something by morning.
So, back out the door, and squirt a lot of that strong 2X Dawn down your beloved dog's back, hose him down with some water, take that old rag you'll never touch again and scrub the devil out of him, all over. Rinse, and REPEAT.
Let your beloved dog shake off while you go get that big old towel, and then rub him down vigorously. Let him shake off again, hug him, sniff him, and tell him you Love Him!!
Next - Let him back in the house and shake your head at how amazing it is at this age you really don't care if he's tracking wet footprints all over the house while he is doing his Lucky Dog Happy Prance to be back in the house!

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